You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
