Me. At least after what I've been through.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
