I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize