life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS