I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
