Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
