Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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