when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Terrible idea I love it
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
