oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Randomize
