My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
