She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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