I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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