K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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