the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
