she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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