i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize