I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Randomize
