we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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