I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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