This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
