i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize