Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
