I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I don't deserve a penis
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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