You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.