im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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