sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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