I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
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