There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me