I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
do herpes really smell.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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