is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
