Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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