i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize