So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
