The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
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The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
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I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
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