I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
