Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize