So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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