At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Duck Duck Cougar?
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Randomize
