your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
