I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
