I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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