brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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