I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
