It's just like the Real World with babies
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
