Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
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