if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
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You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
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I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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