She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
