Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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