After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
