In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
